Can you read minds?

[Bluemound Freak]

The weather was very hot and this man wanted desperately
to take a dive in
a nearby lake. He didn't bring his swimming outfit, but
who cared? He was
all alone. So he undressed and got into the water. After
some delightful
minutes of cool swimming, a pair of old ladies walked
onto the shore in his
direction. He panicked, got out of the water and grabbed
a bucket lying in
the sand nearby. He held the bucket in front of his
private parts and
sighed with relief. The ladies got nearby and looked at
him. He felt
awkward and wanted to move. Then one of the ladies
said: 'You know, I have
a special gift, I can read minds.' 'Impossible', said
the embarrassed man,
'You really know what I think?' 'Yes', the lady
replied, 'Right now, I bet
you think that the bucket you're holding has a bottom

 

[Bluemound Freak]

> This fellow had owned this large farm for several
years. He
>had a
> >large
> > pond in the back forty, had it fixed up nice,
picknic
>tables,
> >horse shoecourts,
> > basketball court, etc. The pond was fixed for
swimming
>when it
> >was built.
> >
> > One evening the old farmer decided to go down
to the pond
>as he
> >hadn't been there for a while and look it over. As
he neared the
>pond,
> >he heard voices shouting and laughing with glee. As
he came
>closer he
> >saw it was a bunch of
> > young women skinny dipping in his pond. He made the
women aware
>of his
> >presence and they all went to the deep end of the
pond. One of
>the women
> >shouted to him, "We're not coming out until you
leave!"
> >
> > The old man replied, "I didnt come down here
to watch you
>ladies
> >swim or get you out of the pond, I only came to feed
my alligators!"
> >