CLE +4? @ NE 37?
Fighting through a slew of injuries, the New England Patriots gained sole possession of first place in the AFC East with last week's overtime victory in Miami. They've done it with great schemes from the coaching staff and a slick buncha crafty veterans with a champion's work ethic and an unblemished home record. I'm aware of the possible emotional letdown following the Pat's big win last week, but the Brownies comin' offa loss to previously winless San Diego don't exactly fill the pews with believers neither. From a fundamental standpoint, I've got these as the league's best teams at defending against the pass, but New England both rushes and defends the rush much better than Cleveland and home teams what can control the line of scrimmage usually cop the coin. Hooray for the red, white and blue! PATRIOTS -4?
DEN +2 @ BAL 38
The Ponies are down to their third-string quarterback, which tells you one thing for certain... they can not afford another injury at the position. Clinton Portis, are you ready? The Rave has their own quarterbacking problems. Not because of injury, but because they freakin' suck, okay? Insteada NFL Football, they should oughtta call this game Rush Limball. That's how conservative I think the play-calling is gunna be. UNDER 38
STL +1? @ PIT 45?
As you old-timers know, I have a great deal of respect for Bill COWher as a football coach. So much so, in fact, that I am taking a pass on what looks like an outright win for the Rams. Pittsburgh simply hasn't got the offense needed to stay with the high-powered St Louis attack. Over the last six weeks in fact, Pittsburgh has not scored more than 20 points a single time. And the only time they scored that many they were beaten 20-41 by the Chiefs! The Rams, meanwhile, haven't scored fewer than 23 over that same chunka time. And in their last three they've put up 37, 36 and 34 points! Still, great coaches make great adjustments. And this is Bill COWher at 2-4, yet only a game outta first place. And now he's marching his team into Heinz Field after having a week off. Is he a great coach? I think he is. So much so, in fact, that I'm taking a pass on what looks like an outright win for the Rams. PASS
SEA -2 @ CIN 42
According to the Cow Power figs, the pointspread in this game is exactly where it oughtta be. It's interesting though, that while the Seahawks have won three of their last four games, they ain't beat the spread since a game 2 shutout of the Arizona Cardinals. The Stripes, on the other hand, have won but two of their previous five contests, yet against the number their record becomes a bankroll- fattening 4-1. I think the Seahawks see themselves as on the fast track to the playoffs. The Bengals are just looking for wins. Playing at home against Seattle, a team both John Kitna and Corey Dillon grew up watching as Washington residents, provides Cincy with a great opportunity. Still not convinced? Try this. Home dogs offa upset wins are historically a solid money-maker. And, hey! I'm playin' 'em, too! So, you got that goin' for ya. BENGALS +2
DET +3 @ CHI 37
And now, another episode of... Nostaglia - It ain't what it used to be.
This game reminds me of the first "wiseguy" what I ever met. Me and Snacks was at Santa Anita, hangin' out at the Clubhouse bar, when this short, fat, yet impeccably dressed old man walked up and immediately began treating everybody around him like freakin' garbage. Me and Snacks was like 22 years old back then and we hadn't had too many dames yet, so we wasn't yet savvy on bein' treated in such a manner. Anyway, when Snacks told the booze jockey a race or two later, that the three horse was about to wire the field, the old dude announced to the bar that Snacks could no sooner read his Daily Racing Form thanna Greek newspaper. Welp, old Snackeroo didn't much care for that. He walked right over to the fat man, slapped a C-note on the bar and said loudly enough to be overheard, "My horse is third choice at three-to-one. I'll bet you a hundred clams that it beats any horse you pick."
The old man gave Snacks the once-over, threw down the resta his Courvosier and said, "The six." As he covered Snacks' hundred with one of his own. The old guy, of course, was no boob. He'd taken the six-to-five favorite. Suddenly, he started to laughin'. Then coughin'. He was laughin' and coughin' so hard he had tears runnin' down his cheeks. Me and Snacks actually started worryin' that he might croak hisself. But he just kept on laughin' and coughin', all the way to the betting windows. That was when the bartender told us that we was dealin' with one of the trouble boys. A genuine hard guy. A gangster, if you will.
"That's Howard "Goody" Goodwin, you guys!" His eyes were pleading with us as he spoke. "He ain't the typa fella you can play around with."
By the time "Goody" returned, the race had started and Snacks had his three horse alone on the lead. The six horse was in the middle of the pack, but beggining to make a move.
Speakina makin' a move... I'm gunna hafta finish this crap up a little later. I'll see yuz around.
Fighting through a slew of injuries, the New England Patriots gained sole possession of first place in the AFC East with last week's overtime victory in Miami. They've done it with great schemes from the coaching staff and a slick buncha crafty veterans with a champion's work ethic and an unblemished home record. I'm aware of the possible emotional letdown following the Pat's big win last week, but the Brownies comin' offa loss to previously winless San Diego don't exactly fill the pews with believers neither. From a fundamental standpoint, I've got these as the league's best teams at defending against the pass, but New England both rushes and defends the rush much better than Cleveland and home teams what can control the line of scrimmage usually cop the coin. Hooray for the red, white and blue! PATRIOTS -4?
DEN +2 @ BAL 38
The Ponies are down to their third-string quarterback, which tells you one thing for certain... they can not afford another injury at the position. Clinton Portis, are you ready? The Rave has their own quarterbacking problems. Not because of injury, but because they freakin' suck, okay? Insteada NFL Football, they should oughtta call this game Rush Limball. That's how conservative I think the play-calling is gunna be. UNDER 38
STL +1? @ PIT 45?
As you old-timers know, I have a great deal of respect for Bill COWher as a football coach. So much so, in fact, that I am taking a pass on what looks like an outright win for the Rams. Pittsburgh simply hasn't got the offense needed to stay with the high-powered St Louis attack. Over the last six weeks in fact, Pittsburgh has not scored more than 20 points a single time. And the only time they scored that many they were beaten 20-41 by the Chiefs! The Rams, meanwhile, haven't scored fewer than 23 over that same chunka time. And in their last three they've put up 37, 36 and 34 points! Still, great coaches make great adjustments. And this is Bill COWher at 2-4, yet only a game outta first place. And now he's marching his team into Heinz Field after having a week off. Is he a great coach? I think he is. So much so, in fact, that I'm taking a pass on what looks like an outright win for the Rams. PASS
SEA -2 @ CIN 42
According to the Cow Power figs, the pointspread in this game is exactly where it oughtta be. It's interesting though, that while the Seahawks have won three of their last four games, they ain't beat the spread since a game 2 shutout of the Arizona Cardinals. The Stripes, on the other hand, have won but two of their previous five contests, yet against the number their record becomes a bankroll- fattening 4-1. I think the Seahawks see themselves as on the fast track to the playoffs. The Bengals are just looking for wins. Playing at home against Seattle, a team both John Kitna and Corey Dillon grew up watching as Washington residents, provides Cincy with a great opportunity. Still not convinced? Try this. Home dogs offa upset wins are historically a solid money-maker. And, hey! I'm playin' 'em, too! So, you got that goin' for ya. BENGALS +2
DET +3 @ CHI 37
And now, another episode of... Nostaglia - It ain't what it used to be.
This game reminds me of the first "wiseguy" what I ever met. Me and Snacks was at Santa Anita, hangin' out at the Clubhouse bar, when this short, fat, yet impeccably dressed old man walked up and immediately began treating everybody around him like freakin' garbage. Me and Snacks was like 22 years old back then and we hadn't had too many dames yet, so we wasn't yet savvy on bein' treated in such a manner. Anyway, when Snacks told the booze jockey a race or two later, that the three horse was about to wire the field, the old dude announced to the bar that Snacks could no sooner read his Daily Racing Form thanna Greek newspaper. Welp, old Snackeroo didn't much care for that. He walked right over to the fat man, slapped a C-note on the bar and said loudly enough to be overheard, "My horse is third choice at three-to-one. I'll bet you a hundred clams that it beats any horse you pick."
The old man gave Snacks the once-over, threw down the resta his Courvosier and said, "The six." As he covered Snacks' hundred with one of his own. The old guy, of course, was no boob. He'd taken the six-to-five favorite. Suddenly, he started to laughin'. Then coughin'. He was laughin' and coughin' so hard he had tears runnin' down his cheeks. Me and Snacks actually started worryin' that he might croak hisself. But he just kept on laughin' and coughin', all the way to the betting windows. That was when the bartender told us that we was dealin' with one of the trouble boys. A genuine hard guy. A gangster, if you will.
"That's Howard "Goody" Goodwin, you guys!" His eyes were pleading with us as he spoke. "He ain't the typa fella you can play around with."
By the time "Goody" returned, the race had started and Snacks had his three horse alone on the lead. The six horse was in the middle of the pack, but beggining to make a move.
Speakina makin' a move... I'm gunna hafta finish this crap up a little later. I'll see yuz around.
