Dictionary of Conservative terms and beliefs

[Master Capper]

While I do not agree with many of these terms some of them are so true of how a vast majority of republicans think:




ABRAHAM LINCOLN: Was a Republican when the party began 140 years ago, so he can be forgiven for freeing the slaves and suppressing states' rights.
ACLU: Bad, because they defend parts of the Bill of Rights.
ACTIVIST JUDGES: Judges that disagree with orthodox conservatism.
ACTIVISTS: Anyone you disagree with. Thus, "activist" judges, "activist" unions, "activist" school boards, and "activist" homosexuals.
AGENDA: All political objectives you oppose. Democrats, liberals, feminists, gays, environmentalists have "agendas." Right-wing politicians have "hopes" and "dreams" and "godly plans of action."
AIDS EPIDEMIC: God's wrath delivered to gays and promiscuous people. - Joseph Leff
BIG GOVERNMENT: Federal social programs that attempt to construct a more rational, fair society.
BLACKS: These didn't exist until they were invented by liberals back in the 1960's.
BOYCOTT: God's preferred method of social change. If the targeted organization capitulates to a boycott, it is proof of "the power of God to change hearts." However, if a boycott is unsuccessful, it proves the organization being boycotted is "hardened" and "in the grip of the Devil."
BROKEN FAMILIES: Refers only to divorce and applies to ALL divorces. Families are never "broken" or "shattered" by bad marriages, domestic violence, child abuse, incest or molestation.
BUREAUCRAT: A Democrat working for the government.
CAREER: The greatest deception ever perpetrated upon women by "radical feminists" and one of the primary causes for The Breakdown Of The Family. Careers for women are "destructive" and "unfulfilling" compared to full-time child-rearing and home education. Women who attempt to balance family and career are seen as "shirking their God-given responsibility" and are responsible for creating another "generation without values."
CHECKS AND BALANCES IN GOVERNMENT: A Republican president, both houses of Congress controlled by Republicans ... and now it's time to appoint some conservative justices of the Supreme Court. - Joseph Leff
CHRISTIAN: Anyone who is a member of the Christian Coalition.
CHRISTIAN FUNDAMENTALISM: The greatest hope for the Integrity of our Beloved Nation.
CIVIL RIGHTS: The concept of equal legal rights; applies to everyone except gay and lesbian Americans for whom equal rights become "special" rights.
CLASS WARFARE: What the Right claims YOU?RE engaging in when you point out that it's what THEY?RE doing.
CREATIONISM: See: INTELLIGENT DESIGN SCIENCE. - Joseph Leff
CRIMINAL: Someone who breaks the law, unless the law has anything to do with guns, selling arms to Iran, or refusing to pay your taxes. In those cases, you are a ...
CRIMINAL RIGHTS: Should be ignored unless said criminal is a member of wacko religious cult or is firearms dealer.
CULT: An institution that is not a RELIGION.
DARWINISM: A completely disproven theory that has no basis in fact whatsoever. - Joseph Leff
DEATH PENALTY: A form of punishment not used often enough. Most right-wing Christians long for the day when this is implemented against gays and lesbians. (See "Compassion.") The only time the death penalty is not considered "God's mighty judgment" is when a death row inmate has become a born-again Christian. Then, the death penalty is "unnecessary" and seen as an "impediment to further ministry" by the inmate slated for execution.
DECEPTION: Term describing the state of being a fellow Christian is in if they disagree with you on a social or theological issue. For example, if another Christian holds views that are pro-choice, pro-gay rights, or anti-death penalty, then they are "deceived." If the same Christian makes a logical, reasoned argument for their position, then they are "misled." If the same Christian also makes a Scriptural argument for their position, then they are "false teachers," "rebellious," and guilty of "twisting the Word." See "Liberal."
DEMOCRATIC PARTY: Communists.
DISNEY: The main force behind The Collapse of Traditional Moral Values, and one of society's greatest threats to The Family, second only to gays and lesbians. Responsible for creating and popularizing the idea of domestic partner benefits.
DOMESTIC PARTNER BENEFITS: Given by most progressive businesses and large corporations years before Disney offered them. Seen as a sign of "collapsing moral values" and as one of the largest threats to The Family. Main impetus for implementing The Boycott, but only against certain companies. See "Disney."
DOMESTIC VIOLENCE: A mythical problem that does not affect The Family, does not injure or kill Christian women, and is never to be addressed.
ENVIRONMENTALISTS: These didn't exist until they were invented by liberals back in the 1960's.
EVOLUTION: A kooky cult started by Charles Darwin.
EXTREMIST: Bill Clinton.
FAMILY VALUES: A mother and father who vote Republican, raising two kids who attend a private school in the suburbs and attend a conservative church.
FEMINISTS: (1) Term (derogatory) for women not sufficiently submissive. Responsible for neglected children, teenage pregnancy, unemployed males, poor SAT scores, breakdown of The Family.
(2) These didn't exist until they were invented by liberals back in the 1960's.
FOUNDING FATHERS: The true heroes who persevered and founded a nation conceived in liberty, and who also share identical beliefs with Rush Limbaugh.
FOX NEWS: The only honest news on TV. - Joseph Leff
GAY/LESBIAN: (1) Homosexual is the preferred term, as it focuses more explicitly on sex. With feminists and liberals, responsible for nearly all social ills (with the possible exception of abortion).
(2) These didn't exist until they were invented by liberals back in the 1960's.
GAY CHRISTIANS: Not possible. Those that claim to exist are "trapped" in a state of Deception, and are first in line for the Lake of Fire because they "twist God's Word." To save them, right-wing Christians must exercise "compassion" and tell them that God wants to kill them.
GOD: See "Republican."
GODLESS ATHEIST: Anyone who is not a member of the Christian Coalition.
GRASSROOTS CITIZEN MOVEMENT: Conservative people exercising their rights to free speech and to petition the government for redress of grievances.
GUNS & AMMO MAGAZINE: Pornography for conservatives.
HATE CRIMES: Do not exist. Just another lie from "militant radical homosexual activists."
HETEROSEXUALS: Never used. Assumed to be everyone on earth, except for a tiny number of "militant radical homosexual activists."
HOLLYWOOD: The source of all evil in Western Civilization. Controlled either by Disney, feminists, liberals, and "militant radical homosexual activists" or Time/Warner when a new rap album is released. Also known as "Mystery Babylon" and "the pit of Hell."
HOMOSEXUAL AGENDA: Gay people exercising their rights to free speech and to petition the government for redress of grievances.
HOMOSEXUALS: Tiny minority of "militant radical activists" seeking special rights, hiring quotas and the destruction of The Family. Recent phenomena signaling "The End Is Near."
IDENTITY POLITICS: When someone who is not a white male brings up race/ethnicity/gender/etc. in political discourse.
IMMIGRANTS: These didn't exist until they were invented by liberals back in the 1960's.
INTELLIGENT DESIGN SCIENCE: A proven science (that never identifies the designer) that completely explains the existence of humans. The opening scene of "2001: A Space Odyssey" is not fiction. - Joseph Leff
ISLAMIC FUNDAMENTALISM: The greatest threat to the Integrity of our Beloved Nation (Fact: Limbaugh has said this on many an occasion).
JESUS CHRIST: A conservative Republican leader to whom some erroneously attribute the phrases "love thy neighbor" and "turn the other cheek."
JUDICIAL ACTIVISM: What liberal judges do.
JUDICIAL SYSTEM: Varying definitions. When ruling against you, the courts are a sneaky way of subverting the "will of the people." Otherwise, a perfectly acceptable way of enforcing God's Will.
LEECH, WELFARE BUM/QUEEN: Any person on the government dole, EXCEPT for corporations receiving tax write-offs, ranchers and farmers receiving subsidies, and defense contractors.
LIBERAL: (1) Anyone who shows human compassion, or reads the New York Times.
(2) A conservative who has been arrested.
LIBERAL IDEOLOGY: Anything espoused in the work of Stephen Jay Gould, Noam Chomsky, or The Nation.
LIBERAL MEDIA: Anything to the left of the American Spectator, G. Gordon Liddy, or Rush Limbaugh.
LIBERTARIANISM: Survival of the fittest, and if you don't like it, you don't deserve to survive.
MATERIALISM: Does not exist; therefore, not an issue. Massive personal wealth among leaders of organizations you support is further evidence of "God's favor."
MEDIA: No such thing. Always "liberal, secular, biased media", responsible for teenage pregnancy, illiteracy, sexual addictions, earthquakes, and the breakdown of The Family.
MILITANT: Never applied to political positions you agree with. Militant pro-lifers, militant pro-familyists, and militant Christians are contradictions in terms.
MODERATE: Pat Robertson.
NRA: Good, because they defend parts of the Bill of Rights.

 

[Master Capper]

PERSECUTION: Suffered if your position on an issue is actively opposed. Examples of "persecution" include investigative journalistic reporting, any lawsuit filed against a church organization by the ACLU, or being yelled at by people you have harassed by fax or phone or misrepresented in your fund-raising materials.
PHYSICIAN: Any doctor, except those who perform abortions. Physicians who perform abortions are "abortionists." See "baby-killer."
POOR PEOPLE: Those who choose neither to work nor to be born into wealthy families. - Joseph Leff
PRO-FAMILY POLITICIAN: Any thrice-divorced Republican congressman late on child-support payments who is against gay marriage.
PRO-LIFER: One who is willing to kill to preserve life.
PROPER GOVERNMENT: Billions upon billons of tax dollars wastefully spent on inefficient and otherwise prohibitively costly defense contracts, subsidies and tax breaks for corporations, and "The War on Drugs."
PUBLIC BROADCASTING: Rush Limbaugh (historical note: Newt Gingrich actually said this!).
PUBLIC SERVANT: A Republican working for the government.
RADICAL: Applied to anyone who disagrees with you. Thus, "radical" homosexuals, "radical" feminists, "radical" environmentalists. Right-wing Christians are not radical, they are "committed" and "focused."
RECALL A GOVERNOR: To be considered valid only when there are a lot of rich people putting money into the campaign for the recall. It's OK to use resources from out of state. - Joseph Leff
RELIGION: (1) What should be taught at public schools instead of science.
(2) Conservative Biblical literalism.
REPUBLICAN: See "God."
REPUBLICAN PARTY: A political party which welcomes all conservatives, as long as they are pro-life, pro-gun, and anti everything else.
RKBA: The Right to Kill and Bomb Americans.
RONALD REAGAN: The greatest President ever.
RUSH LIMBAUGH: The leading conservative intellectual (do I really need to insert a snide comment here?).
SCHOLARSHIP: Any work such as The Bell Curve, The American Spectator, or The Limbaugh Letter.
SEX EDUCATION: Just say "no" to sex, condoms, abortions and adoptions (especially of disabled children). - Joseph Leff
SOCIAL ENGINEERING: (Syn. Social Experimentation) Term for the "activist agendas" of political opponents. Opposite is the "natural God-given plan" as defined only by right-wing Christians.
SOUND JURISPRUDENCE: What conservative judges do.
SPECIAL RIGHTS: (1) Constitutional rights for minorities you don't like.
(2) Applied only to gay and lesbian Americans. Refers to marriage, adoption and other rights automatically granted to heterosexuals.
(3) Equal rights for gays.
STATES' RIGHTS: The right for individual states to pass conservative laws without interference from Washington. Note: does not apply if states pass liberal laws.
SUBVERSIVE ELEMENTS IN SOCIETY: Bookstores, coffeehouses, art galleries, and anything inside the city limits of a major American city.
SUPREME COURT: "Activist" when ruling against you, but "evidence of the mighty hand of God" when ruling in your favor or when Clarence Thomas is admitted to the bench.
SUPREME COURT APPOINTMENTS: Varying definitions. A presidential right, if president is Republican. Called "stacking the court" if president is Democrat.
TAX CUT: Will save our country from______ (fill in the blank with any problem at all). - Joseph Leff
TEN PERCENT: A lie about the percentage of the population that is gay or lesbian popularized by "militant radical homosexual activists," when in fact Right-wing Christian organizations have "proven" the figure is closer to one percent. How one percent of the population is responsible for The Destruction Of The Family is never clearly explained. See "Avoiding Difficult Questions."
THE FAMILY: Unit of heterosexual male head of household married for life to heterosexual female homemaker, with biological home-schooled children conceived without birth control at least 9 months after marriage in conservative Bible-believing church. No exceptions.
TRADITIONAL VALUES: The classic values and morals that made America great, such as lynching blacks, beating up gays, and keeping the "little woman" barefoot and pregnant.
UNSOUND JURISPRUDENCE: What liberal judges do. - Joseph Leff
VICTIM OF SOCIETY: Any white male, especially a conservative one, who is suffering now more than any other race in all history.
WASHINGTON: The heart of the Evil Empire.
"WILL OF THE PEOPLE": Used only when the public votes your way. Acceptable method of denying constitutional rights of minorities. Never used when public opinion is against you (i.e. abortion, doctor-assisted suicide, etc.).
WOMEN: See "wives", "mothers", or "homemakers." No other definition available.

 

[ocelot]

Brilliant MC. Telling it like it is. This one's a keeper.

 

[CHARLESMANSON]

Yeah Ocelot--this one IS A KEEPER.....it's about all you liberals got!!!!!!

:clap:

What a bunch of sore losers lol. Nice political party. Nice values. Your political stragetgy is to attack your own government.

Instead of offereing solutions or plans to help our country all you do is critisize and whine and act like crybabies.

When you keep losing elections it is best to act like a crybaby loser and take shots at the people who defeated you. This is today's democratic party. DESPERATE! They point fingers and attack because they are sore losers. Seriously...what is the point? Why attack everyday? What good are you all doing????? You are only dragging your own party down. Keep it up!! It will keep us conservatives in power. :clap:

 

[CHARLESMANSON]

You guys keep sitting on the sidelines and complaining, fingerpointing and insulting. Us Republicans will keep winning elections. :clap:

 

[ferdville]

I will start with number one and leave it at that. Lincoln did not free ALL the slaves, just some of them. Supressing state'r rights was the norm in that era.

 

[dawgball]

Yet again, another extrremely "centrist" pst by MC.

Would you grace us with the ones that the "vast majority" of Republicans agree with. There may be some. I didn't read the second post.

 

[Marco]

Great post MC.....

I didn't realize the scope of all the uptight, Christian, gun-toting Ward Cleavers until reading all that..

That comment about "Us Republicans will keep winning elections"......

Keep cheering for your soccer team, guys like me know this country was bought and paid for by corporate America a long, long time ago....Rep or Dem means little when the real problems never get solved by either party.....

But woo-hoo! You'll get a lot of trophies while the country continues to circle the drain... :mj07:

 

[CHARLESMANSON]

Go ahead and critisize us Republicans for cheering on our country. WE ARE PATRIOTS!! You're just a sore loser.

The only thing circling the drain nowadays is the Democratic party....just look at who their leaders are!! :mj07: And hell, the democrats bring nothing to the table other than bitching and moaning and finger-pointing. No wonder you guess cant win elections anymore.

BTW, We don't need trophies...we like the White House better. :thefinger

 

[Marco]

My point was shown exactly by that post.....no clue about social security, health care costs busting through the roof, $7 trillion dollar national debt...

And some people actually wonder why I don't bother to vote when serious plans aren't discussed in Washington about the problems formerly listed, when politicians vote themselves a 100% retirement courtesy of the general fund, when there's more money for Israel than American schools...

Yeah, real patriots, just thinking about America in typical fashion....

Yee-hawwwwww! We got another trophy/white house, whatever you wanna call it while the USA rusts in real time. :clap:

 

[ferdville]

It is people that don't bother to vote that contribute to this sorry situation. I find that a horribly immature viewpoint. Congress is corrupt and self-serving to be sure, but find someone with character and support them. Sitting on the sidelines (and complaining) is way too easy. Get involved and do things to make things better. Even if you don't agree with me or Kosar or anyone else here, be proactive and maybe things will change. They are not going to change if we do nothing.

 

[ryson]

And some people actually wonder why I don't bother to vote

Amazing, you are very critical of the current administration and you don't vote....typical all hat no cattle

 

[ocelot]

Ferdville, good posts.

Father Abraham Lincoln is perhaps the Biggest Myth and Lie in American History. John Wilkes Booth did the country a great service.

 

[Master Capper]

Dawgball,

First of all, this was posted tongue in cheek but after rereading it I do believe a vast majority of these terms could be applied to people on the very extreme of the far right as this is how they actually think. As far as posting something negative about the Dem's, I would if I saw someone posting something that was extremely far left but to be honest I really don't see guys like Kosar, Ocelot etc.. posting thoughts that are really off the wall and if anything most of their posts seem to me to be if anything more in the moderate tone. I believe that neither of the parties have produced many good ideas in the past few years and really believe that the Bush Administration is the worst administration to exist in the oval office in my lifetime, but at the same time I really dont see anyone on the other side that has any new fresh ideas that would make things better.

 

[dawgball]

some of them are so true of how a vast majority of republicans think:

The Republican Party is not made up of a "vast majority" of "extreme of the far right". That was my only comment. I actually laughed at many of these terms because I only hope that most people do take them as tongue in cheek. Your lead in to it clearly did not introduce it like that.

I think my point is that there are far fewer "centrists" on this board than people like to tout. Here are a few, in my opinion, and this list does not include everyone: kosar and djv (djv is an equal opportunity complainer which I guess makes him a centrist).

You and Ocelot certainly do not come off as middle of the road.

I am a Republican, but I feel that I am far from the fringe. Being a Republican or Democrat does not mean that you are lock-step with that party. It simply means that what the Party (not the politicians in it) stands for is close to what you believe. I would almost always take a Republican President over a Democratic one, BUT I think Clinton (simply mentioning him because he was the most recent) did an above average to pretty good job while he was in office.

Do I agree with Manson and Palehose most of the time? Absolutely not. I think some of their thoughts are okay, but they almost always go too far. BUT I do give them credit for standing for something.

Someone claiming to be a centrist USUALLY just wants to fit in.

The reason why I think kosar actually is a centrist is because he voices an opinion and stands by them regardless of the tide. And I don't think I have ever seen him consistently bash a party for bashing's sake. He certainly is not afraid to call someone to task, but there is usually a clear reason that he is. That is admirable.

Basically what you posted is Left Wing propaganda. Is there Right Wing Propaganda? Absolutely! But you certainly won't see me posting it stating that it is representative of the "vast majority" of the Democratic Party.

But this whole "centrist" movement is just another herd of sheep, in my opinion.

 

[dawgball]

One last thing. My in-laws are teetering on that right fringe that you refer to, and I constantly butt heads with them about it.

I would if I saw someone posting something that was extremely far left but to be honest I really don't see guys like Kosar, Ocelot etc.. posting thoughts that are really off the wall and if anything most of their posts seem to me to be if anything more in the moderate tone.

I had a conversation with my mother-in-law about two years ago about Rush Limbaugh. She honestly felt that his statements were usually moderate (please don't judge her on that alone ). Can you believe that? I had a hard time swallowing it. BUT the reason she thought they were moderate is because they were mostly in line with what she thought. It's funny how the human brain works that way.

I guess what I would like to see is more acceptance. I try to disassociate myself with the far right in conversations like this because its polarizing to a good conversation. I feel that threads like these serve the same purpose. It just doesn't help to move along a debate or to convince the other side to listen to your arguments (which I have seen many of yours that were very convincing).

So anyway, have a good day you far left wing, tree hugging, demonstrating freak! :mj14:

 

[AR182]

mc quote:"believe that the Bush Administration is the worst administration to exist in the oval office in my lifetime"


mc,

you're younger than i thought.......because if you lived through the carter administration you would know that his administration was the worst in the last 50 years.

 

[Master Capper]

AR,

You may be right on Carter as he is one of those guys that when I think of Presidents he really doesnt come to mind because he was worthless. I was too young at the time to really recall his failures or his achievements and all I can really recall about him is skipping the olympics and that he had a drunk brother. The presidents that I can actually recall are Reagan, Bush, Clinton and Bush Jr and in my opinion I would rank them from best to worst as: Reagan, Clinton, Bush, Bush Jr.

 

[ferdville]

I can't imagine too many people finding Limbaugh very credible these days. Since he was really the first of his kind nationwide, he made a splash. Even without the drug mess, I think he was losing his stature. However, I would also imagine that alot of the religious right that Bush attracts might still see him as worthy. Don't really know how he is looked at in other parts of the country, especially mid America. In California he is a nothing.

 

[dawgball]

ferdville--your're probably right. That was two years ago. But after that conversation I steer away from too many political debates at their house. :wall:

She would probably not have the same opinion of him today. Or at least I will give her that credit.