***** DO YOU THINK YOU HAVE A GAMBLING PROBLEM? *****
I don?t know. The best stinking answer to the question of whether I have a gambling problem or not was, ?I don?t know.? It is an insanely difficult question which, in all honestly, is generally oversimplified by avid gamblers.
Simplicity was simply not an option in my case because it was being asked of me by my boss. It was not a contemptuous situation. There was no threat of termination. My boss is, however, the owner of a highly successful public relations firm in Los Angeles and the author of eleven books. Though he seems to be a very smart man, he is blissfully unaware of the intricacies of my two passions, sports handicapping and professional wrestling. Because of this, he finds my hobbies wholly intriguing. A great many writers are neither wrestling fans nor gamblers, and therefore my vocation makes me a bit of an oddity.
In being so successful in his career, my boss puts tremendous value on truth and responsibility. He believes in avoiding lies and excuses at all costs. Therefore, I felt compelled to take a moment of introspection and actually consider my answer before telling him.
You see, when 99% of the people in this world ask me that question, the answer is a simple no. Gambling is a passion and a hobby I enjoy, but not a problem. It puts little, if any financial strain on me, as I have generally made money betting on sports. I have been able to work effectively at jobs while gambling. My relationship with my family is relatively healthy and I have a good number of friends that I relate to on a daily basis without ever having to drag them into the muck of my gambling habit. It seems that all the general signs point to gambling being a hobby in many ways no different from other common male hobbies such as golf or automobiles.
But as he stared at me in his office, not so much questioning my ability to control my gambling habit as much to inquire into my emotional health, I could see the real question in his eyes, clear as day: Am I really better off with gambling as a major hobby?
I mean, if I gave up gambling tomorrow and devoted my time to something else, would I be happier? Would I feel more fulfilled? How about bodybuilding? I am a pretty thin guy, so maybe a couple of steroid cycles and hours spent in the gym in lieu of handicapping would make me a happier guy. Or I could act. Or try my hand as a standup comic. My friends say I am a funny guy (when we meet in Vegas, as me about the night in the dorms before a freshman chemistry test, you will laugh your ass off). I could take the (enjoyable) hours spent following sports and handicapping and reroute them to morally loftier pursuits.
But I love gambling. I really do. I am not afraid to admit it. In fact, I?ve always loved gambling. I?ve always loved playing cards, rolling dice. I believe it?s the sportsman in me. The sweet nectar of victory is my siren?s call. I want to win at whatever I do, and gambling is the purest form of victory around. Though it would be nice to be the next Ben Affleck or Christopher Wright, I enjoy gambling too much to give it up entirely in pursuit of those things at this stage in my life.
If we establish that I enjoy gambling, then let?s go back to it being a possible problem. Enjoyment does not equal health, you see. Plenty of folks enjoy drugs or alcohol or whatever other vice you conjure up, and many of them would be better off without them.
As a starting point, let?s take a look at Gambler?s Anonymous. They have a website that every gambler should at least visit for information?s sake at www.gamblersanonymous.org. On that site is a list of twenty questions. On the site it says most compulsive gamblers will answer ?yes? to at least seven of them. Here they are:
1. Did you ever lose time from work or school due to gambling?
2. Has gambling ever made your home life unhappy?
3. Did gambling affect your reputation?
4. Have you ever felt remorse after gambling?
5. Did you ever gamble to get money with which to pay debts or otherwise solve financial difficulties?
6. Did gambling cause a decrease in your ambition or efficiency?
7. After losing did you feel you must return as soon as possible and win back your losses?
8. After a win did you have a strong urge to return and win more?
9. Did you often gamble until your last dollar was gone?
10. Did you ever borrow to finance your gambling?
11. Have you ever sold anything to finance gambling?
12. Were you reluctant to use "gambling money" for normal expenditures?
13. Did gambling make you careless of the welfare of yourself or your family?
14. Did you ever gamble longer than you had planned?
15. Have you ever gambled to escape worry or trouble?
16. Have you ever committed, or considered committing, an illegal act to finance gambling?
17. Did gambling cause you to have difficulty in sleeping?
18. Do arguments, disappointments or frustrations create within you an urge to gamble?
19. Did you ever have an urge to celebrate any good fortune by a few hours of gambling?
20. Have you ever considered self destruction or suicide as a result of your gambling?
Personally, I think the list is bogus. While I don?t question the good intentions of Gambler?s Anonymous to help real compulsive gamblers with real problems, I do think the list goes a bit overboard. For example, I think every gambler, compulsive or not, feels some amount of remorse after a loss. I think every gambler (often unfairly) has their reputation affected due to societal stereotypes (which happen to be true in most cases, but still...) I also cannot imagine a gambler not having a strong urge to try to win more after winning. In fact, I find questions 3, 4, 8, 14 and 19 to be a bit unfair. If answers in those cases are ?repeatedly, yes?, then I see a problem. But I think the nature of gambling is that those five scenarios will arise no matter if you are a compulsive or casual gambler.
Anyway, back to my point. If I am totally honest with myself, I would probably answer ?yes? to at least seven questions. This survey is hardly the bible of determining a gambling problem, but that fact certainly makes me think.
What about moral questions? I would challenge any gambler to find an example of moral code which legitimizes gambling. it simply doesn?t exist. In every instance gambling is viewed as a moral vice. It may be less severe than substance abuse or philandering, but it is a moral vice, make no mistake about it.
I have to go off on a tangent, as I am sure a good number of people could take offense to the labeling of gambling as a moral vice. Morality is not measured by severity, only activity. Investing in a 401K may be a nearly benign form of gambling, but the fact remains that there is rick involved. You could lose money. Now, our society is an extremely secular society. A good many people have simply created their own code of ethics where gambling is not only accepted but endorsed. That is their absolute right, but it does not escape the fact that gambling is viewed as a moral vice in every instance of moral code available to human beings.
If I know gambling is a moral vice, then why do i do it? Good question. I suppose it is an issue of risk vs. reward. I enjoy gambling and it gives me the reward not just of money, but entertainment and activity as well. I realize that all people have vices and I accept that gambling is a vice of mine. In my particular case, the time and emotional drain of my vice is worth the pleasure and clarity that I receive from it.
So gamblers anonymous would label me a compulsive if I took their little test. And I am aware it is a vice, even though I have come to grips with that fact and I accept it. What other issues are there?
Well, there?s always the old, ?Could you quit if you wanted to?? When I gave my boss my original answer of, ?I don?t know,? he immediately retorted with that very question. In a way it is irrelevant, but I answered it anyway. ?Probably not.? If I cashed out all my accounts and resigned from Mad Jack?s and canceled any future trips to Vegas, it probably would not last forever. I have gone months at a time without gambling. In fact, during those months I barely missed it. It was at a time some time ago when gambling wasn?t particularly profitable so the time off was easier to justify. But in my opinion I highly doubt that I could stay away from all gambling forever, even if I tried.
After answering that second question that my boss posed, we discussed the topic a bit more, and then moved back to a more job related discussion. In fact, he asked me to help him procure a panel of addicted gamblers for his radio show (anyone in the L.A. area, give me a call). He did give me one last comment that was something of an inspiration for this piece. He said my views on gambling and my relationship with it are healthy. It wasn?t that gambling itself was necessarily healthy or unhealthy for me, but my willingness to be honest with myself and analyze the worth of one of my greatest passions was an emotionally healthy endeavor. I have to be honest, I felt quite good about that. Whether gambling is good for me or not, at least the nature in which I relate to my hobby is a healthy one essentially bereft of the classic emotional savages of denial and justification.
I know what you are probably thinking: do I think that I have a gambling problem? In all honesty...I still don?t know. I don?t know if my life would be better without gambling. I certainly love handicapping and writing about handicapping, but I just have a hard time accurately weighing the advantages and disadvantages to making gambling such a passionate hobby.
In closing, I would like to say that I mean this piece to be less about my personal issues than about the nature of most gamblers? relationships with their hobby. I do believe that introspection is healthy. I do believe that questioning what you do and why you do it from time to time can help a person in the long run emotionally. I truly believe that most of the people who frequent this site are like me in some ways. I believe most people question the wisdom of pursuing gambling as a hobby from time to time. I even believe that some people may use gambling or this very site as a crutch. They may feel that without one or both of those things in their life, there will be an emotional void that will go unfulfilled. No matter how damaging a vice or hobby may be to someone, it is hard to let it go.
As we head into the peak of the gambling year, football season, I hope many of you keep these things in mind. No matter if you are the most sophisticated professional or the most rank amateur, remember that self knowledge (not in that way, ya dirty bastards) is healthy. Know why you gamble. Know its benefits to you, and know its drawbacks. And know that no situation over the course of this situation or your life is so desperate that resolution ceases to be an option. Good luck to everybody.
Oh and one more thing about football season and the Ace?s Gold contest. To quote Larry Bird, ?So which of you guys is playin? for second??
I don?t know. The best stinking answer to the question of whether I have a gambling problem or not was, ?I don?t know.? It is an insanely difficult question which, in all honestly, is generally oversimplified by avid gamblers.
Simplicity was simply not an option in my case because it was being asked of me by my boss. It was not a contemptuous situation. There was no threat of termination. My boss is, however, the owner of a highly successful public relations firm in Los Angeles and the author of eleven books. Though he seems to be a very smart man, he is blissfully unaware of the intricacies of my two passions, sports handicapping and professional wrestling. Because of this, he finds my hobbies wholly intriguing. A great many writers are neither wrestling fans nor gamblers, and therefore my vocation makes me a bit of an oddity.
In being so successful in his career, my boss puts tremendous value on truth and responsibility. He believes in avoiding lies and excuses at all costs. Therefore, I felt compelled to take a moment of introspection and actually consider my answer before telling him.
You see, when 99% of the people in this world ask me that question, the answer is a simple no. Gambling is a passion and a hobby I enjoy, but not a problem. It puts little, if any financial strain on me, as I have generally made money betting on sports. I have been able to work effectively at jobs while gambling. My relationship with my family is relatively healthy and I have a good number of friends that I relate to on a daily basis without ever having to drag them into the muck of my gambling habit. It seems that all the general signs point to gambling being a hobby in many ways no different from other common male hobbies such as golf or automobiles.
But as he stared at me in his office, not so much questioning my ability to control my gambling habit as much to inquire into my emotional health, I could see the real question in his eyes, clear as day: Am I really better off with gambling as a major hobby?
I mean, if I gave up gambling tomorrow and devoted my time to something else, would I be happier? Would I feel more fulfilled? How about bodybuilding? I am a pretty thin guy, so maybe a couple of steroid cycles and hours spent in the gym in lieu of handicapping would make me a happier guy. Or I could act. Or try my hand as a standup comic. My friends say I am a funny guy (when we meet in Vegas, as me about the night in the dorms before a freshman chemistry test, you will laugh your ass off). I could take the (enjoyable) hours spent following sports and handicapping and reroute them to morally loftier pursuits.
But I love gambling. I really do. I am not afraid to admit it. In fact, I?ve always loved gambling. I?ve always loved playing cards, rolling dice. I believe it?s the sportsman in me. The sweet nectar of victory is my siren?s call. I want to win at whatever I do, and gambling is the purest form of victory around. Though it would be nice to be the next Ben Affleck or Christopher Wright, I enjoy gambling too much to give it up entirely in pursuit of those things at this stage in my life.
If we establish that I enjoy gambling, then let?s go back to it being a possible problem. Enjoyment does not equal health, you see. Plenty of folks enjoy drugs or alcohol or whatever other vice you conjure up, and many of them would be better off without them.
As a starting point, let?s take a look at Gambler?s Anonymous. They have a website that every gambler should at least visit for information?s sake at www.gamblersanonymous.org. On that site is a list of twenty questions. On the site it says most compulsive gamblers will answer ?yes? to at least seven of them. Here they are:
1. Did you ever lose time from work or school due to gambling?
2. Has gambling ever made your home life unhappy?
3. Did gambling affect your reputation?
4. Have you ever felt remorse after gambling?
5. Did you ever gamble to get money with which to pay debts or otherwise solve financial difficulties?
6. Did gambling cause a decrease in your ambition or efficiency?
7. After losing did you feel you must return as soon as possible and win back your losses?
8. After a win did you have a strong urge to return and win more?
9. Did you often gamble until your last dollar was gone?
10. Did you ever borrow to finance your gambling?
11. Have you ever sold anything to finance gambling?
12. Were you reluctant to use "gambling money" for normal expenditures?
13. Did gambling make you careless of the welfare of yourself or your family?
14. Did you ever gamble longer than you had planned?
15. Have you ever gambled to escape worry or trouble?
16. Have you ever committed, or considered committing, an illegal act to finance gambling?
17. Did gambling cause you to have difficulty in sleeping?
18. Do arguments, disappointments or frustrations create within you an urge to gamble?
19. Did you ever have an urge to celebrate any good fortune by a few hours of gambling?
20. Have you ever considered self destruction or suicide as a result of your gambling?
Personally, I think the list is bogus. While I don?t question the good intentions of Gambler?s Anonymous to help real compulsive gamblers with real problems, I do think the list goes a bit overboard. For example, I think every gambler, compulsive or not, feels some amount of remorse after a loss. I think every gambler (often unfairly) has their reputation affected due to societal stereotypes (which happen to be true in most cases, but still...) I also cannot imagine a gambler not having a strong urge to try to win more after winning. In fact, I find questions 3, 4, 8, 14 and 19 to be a bit unfair. If answers in those cases are ?repeatedly, yes?, then I see a problem. But I think the nature of gambling is that those five scenarios will arise no matter if you are a compulsive or casual gambler.
Anyway, back to my point. If I am totally honest with myself, I would probably answer ?yes? to at least seven questions. This survey is hardly the bible of determining a gambling problem, but that fact certainly makes me think.
What about moral questions? I would challenge any gambler to find an example of moral code which legitimizes gambling. it simply doesn?t exist. In every instance gambling is viewed as a moral vice. It may be less severe than substance abuse or philandering, but it is a moral vice, make no mistake about it.
I have to go off on a tangent, as I am sure a good number of people could take offense to the labeling of gambling as a moral vice. Morality is not measured by severity, only activity. Investing in a 401K may be a nearly benign form of gambling, but the fact remains that there is rick involved. You could lose money. Now, our society is an extremely secular society. A good many people have simply created their own code of ethics where gambling is not only accepted but endorsed. That is their absolute right, but it does not escape the fact that gambling is viewed as a moral vice in every instance of moral code available to human beings.
If I know gambling is a moral vice, then why do i do it? Good question. I suppose it is an issue of risk vs. reward. I enjoy gambling and it gives me the reward not just of money, but entertainment and activity as well. I realize that all people have vices and I accept that gambling is a vice of mine. In my particular case, the time and emotional drain of my vice is worth the pleasure and clarity that I receive from it.
So gamblers anonymous would label me a compulsive if I took their little test. And I am aware it is a vice, even though I have come to grips with that fact and I accept it. What other issues are there?
Well, there?s always the old, ?Could you quit if you wanted to?? When I gave my boss my original answer of, ?I don?t know,? he immediately retorted with that very question. In a way it is irrelevant, but I answered it anyway. ?Probably not.? If I cashed out all my accounts and resigned from Mad Jack?s and canceled any future trips to Vegas, it probably would not last forever. I have gone months at a time without gambling. In fact, during those months I barely missed it. It was at a time some time ago when gambling wasn?t particularly profitable so the time off was easier to justify. But in my opinion I highly doubt that I could stay away from all gambling forever, even if I tried.
After answering that second question that my boss posed, we discussed the topic a bit more, and then moved back to a more job related discussion. In fact, he asked me to help him procure a panel of addicted gamblers for his radio show (anyone in the L.A. area, give me a call). He did give me one last comment that was something of an inspiration for this piece. He said my views on gambling and my relationship with it are healthy. It wasn?t that gambling itself was necessarily healthy or unhealthy for me, but my willingness to be honest with myself and analyze the worth of one of my greatest passions was an emotionally healthy endeavor. I have to be honest, I felt quite good about that. Whether gambling is good for me or not, at least the nature in which I relate to my hobby is a healthy one essentially bereft of the classic emotional savages of denial and justification.
I know what you are probably thinking: do I think that I have a gambling problem? In all honesty...I still don?t know. I don?t know if my life would be better without gambling. I certainly love handicapping and writing about handicapping, but I just have a hard time accurately weighing the advantages and disadvantages to making gambling such a passionate hobby.
In closing, I would like to say that I mean this piece to be less about my personal issues than about the nature of most gamblers? relationships with their hobby. I do believe that introspection is healthy. I do believe that questioning what you do and why you do it from time to time can help a person in the long run emotionally. I truly believe that most of the people who frequent this site are like me in some ways. I believe most people question the wisdom of pursuing gambling as a hobby from time to time. I even believe that some people may use gambling or this very site as a crutch. They may feel that without one or both of those things in their life, there will be an emotional void that will go unfulfilled. No matter how damaging a vice or hobby may be to someone, it is hard to let it go.
As we head into the peak of the gambling year, football season, I hope many of you keep these things in mind. No matter if you are the most sophisticated professional or the most rank amateur, remember that self knowledge (not in that way, ya dirty bastards) is healthy. Know why you gamble. Know its benefits to you, and know its drawbacks. And know that no situation over the course of this situation or your life is so desperate that resolution ceases to be an option. Good luck to everybody.
Oh and one more thing about football season and the Ace?s Gold contest. To quote Larry Bird, ?So which of you guys is playin? for second??
