A while ago, I was at a flea market and two old ladies were arguing about my looks...
Old Lady #1 -- "He looks like Joey Buttafucco."
Old Lady #2 -- "I think he looks more like Fidel Castro."
Old Lady #1 -- "Well, without the beard, he does have that aged, weathered look. But the hair makes him look like that pervert, Buttafucco."
Old Lady #2 -- "In either case, he's overweight."