You all know the REAL reason you watch the World Cup. It's not to see Zidane's playmaking brilliance (or to hear the ABC commentator call him "the quarterback of the French offense"), it's not to enjoy the South Americans' flair (and injury simulation prowess), it's not to be reduced to tears by a Cinderella story of a valiant underdog (as long as they is not commies or them axis of evil, you know).
No, the real beauty of this momentous event is in the striped sky-blue and white Argentina shirts and in the three lions on the English logo. The real suspence is to see when Germany will be forced to wear green for the first time. The real drama is the fury inspired by another African fashion overstatement.
So, let's start musing over this year's WC fashions, shall we not?
It is nice to see that the Crazy Nineties are over and the football trends are leaning towards simplification again.
France, Germany, Saudi Arabia, Argentina, Sweden, Spain and even South Africa are all wearing the new Adidas shirt which is purpously understated. No side panels, no elaborate sleeve patterns, just a solid-colour shirt with plain shorts and socks.
It looks especially nice on France, Spain, Germany and Argentina, but the Saudi all-green is rather dull. I am particularly impressed with South Africa, whose 1998 kit was probably the second most tragic thing to happen to the country after Apartheid.
Ireland did well with their green kit, omitting the orange trim which was omnipresent in the Nineties.
Senegal looks rather outdated with those mulitcoloured sleeves, but the national-flag pattern is easy on the eye.
Paraguay stick with the tradition to wear red-white stripes, but introduce the extraordinary long shorts which probably belong in the Forties.
Big thumbs down to Nigeria for disgracing their kit with this nuclear-green shade.
Am I the only one who thinks that Uruguay sky-blue and black kit is the best thing out there?
As everyone else is leaning towards simplification, Slovenia is poised to remain the last bastion of ugliness, unleashing the strangest design on their shirts, which appears to be either the country's mountain landscape or the players' cardiogramm printout.
The special case, of course, is Cameroon who was prohibited by FIFA to wear sleeveless shirts (a move that should quiet those critics who still aren't convinced that FIFA indeed does occasionally do things that actually are for the good of the game). They desided to waltz around that ruling by inroducing the short black sleeves that are meant to blend in with their dark skin and create the "sleeveless" illusion. For this insiduous disregard for tradition I hereby declare Cameroon The Enemy Of Football Number Two (Number One, of course, is Bob Costas) and wish them to burn in hell or to allow 8 goals against Germany, whichever is more painful.
No, the real beauty of this momentous event is in the striped sky-blue and white Argentina shirts and in the three lions on the English logo. The real suspence is to see when Germany will be forced to wear green for the first time. The real drama is the fury inspired by another African fashion overstatement.
So, let's start musing over this year's WC fashions, shall we not?
It is nice to see that the Crazy Nineties are over and the football trends are leaning towards simplification again.
France, Germany, Saudi Arabia, Argentina, Sweden, Spain and even South Africa are all wearing the new Adidas shirt which is purpously understated. No side panels, no elaborate sleeve patterns, just a solid-colour shirt with plain shorts and socks.
It looks especially nice on France, Spain, Germany and Argentina, but the Saudi all-green is rather dull. I am particularly impressed with South Africa, whose 1998 kit was probably the second most tragic thing to happen to the country after Apartheid.
Ireland did well with their green kit, omitting the orange trim which was omnipresent in the Nineties.
Senegal looks rather outdated with those mulitcoloured sleeves, but the national-flag pattern is easy on the eye.
Paraguay stick with the tradition to wear red-white stripes, but introduce the extraordinary long shorts which probably belong in the Forties.
Big thumbs down to Nigeria for disgracing their kit with this nuclear-green shade.
Am I the only one who thinks that Uruguay sky-blue and black kit is the best thing out there?
As everyone else is leaning towards simplification, Slovenia is poised to remain the last bastion of ugliness, unleashing the strangest design on their shirts, which appears to be either the country's mountain landscape or the players' cardiogramm printout.
The special case, of course, is Cameroon who was prohibited by FIFA to wear sleeveless shirts (a move that should quiet those critics who still aren't convinced that FIFA indeed does occasionally do things that actually are for the good of the game). They desided to waltz around that ruling by inroducing the short black sleeves that are meant to blend in with their dark skin and create the "sleeveless" illusion. For this insiduous disregard for tradition I hereby declare Cameroon The Enemy Of Football Number Two (Number One, of course, is Bob Costas) and wish them to burn in hell or to allow 8 goals against Germany, whichever is more painful.
