NORM PETERSON'S FAMOUS QUOTES
---------
"Can I draw you a beer Norm?"
"No, I know what they look like. Just pour me one."
---------
"How's a beer sound Norm?"
"I dunno. I usually finish them before they get a word in."
---------
"What's shaking Norm?"
"All four cheeks and a couple of chins."
---------
"What would you say to a nice beer Normie?"
"Going Down?"
---------
[Norm comes in depressed. He just stands by the door with a sullen face.]
[mutters] "Afternoon, everybody."
"Norm!" [everyone cries out.]
"What's new Normie?"
"Terrorists, Sam. They've taken over my stomach, and they're demanding beer."
---------
"What'll it be Normie?"
"Just the usual coach. I'll have a froth of beer and a snorkel."
---------
"What would you say to a beer Normie?"
"Daddy wuvs you."
---------
"What'd you like Normie?"
"A reason to live. Give me another beer."
---------
"What'll you have Normie?"
"Well I'm in a gambling mood, Sammy. I'll take a glass of whatever comes out
of that tap." "Oh, looks like beer, Norm."
"Call me Mister Lucky."
---------
"What'd you say Norm?"
"Any cheap, tawdry thing that'll get me a beer."
---------
"What'd you say to a beer Norm?"
"Hiya, sailor. New in town?"
---------
[coming in from the rain]"Evening everybody"
[everybody]"Norm!"
"Still pouring Norm?"
"That's funny, I was about to ask you the same thing."
---------
"Whaddya say, Norm?"
"Well, I never met a beer I didn't drink. And down it goes."
---------
"Hey Norm, How's the world been treating you?"
"Like a baby treats a diaper."
---------
"Would you like a beer Mr. Peterson?"
"No, I'd like a dead cat in a glass."
---------
"How's life treating you?"
"It's not, Sammy, but you can."
---------
"What's the story Mr. Peterson?"
"The Bobbsey twins go to the brewery. Let's cut to the happy ending."
---------
"Hey, Mr Peterson, there's a cold one waiting for you."
"I know, and if she calls, I'm not here."
---------
"Beer, Norm?"
"Have I gotten that predictable? Good."
---------
"What's going on, Mr. Peterson?"
"A flashing sign in my gut that says, 'Insert beer here.'"
---------
Hey, Mr. Peterson, Jack Frost nipping at your nose?"
"Yep, now let's get Joe Beer nipping at my liver, huh?"
----------
"What's going on Mr. Peterson?"
"Another layer for the winter, Wood."
----------
"Whatcha up to Norm?"
"My ideal weight if I were eleven feet tall."
----------
"How's it going Mr. Peterson?"
"Poor."
"I'm sorry to hear that."
"No, I mean pour."
----------
"How's life treating you Norm?"
"Like it caught me sleeping with its' wife."
----------
"Women, can't live with 'em.....pass the beer nuts."
----------
"What's going down, Normie?"
"My butt cheeks on that bar stool."
----------
"Pour you a beer, Mr. Peterson?"
"Alright, but stop me at one....make that one thirty."
----------
"How's it going Mr. Peterson?"
"It's a dog eat dog world, Woody, and I'm wearing Milk Bone underwear."
----------
"What's the story Norm?"
"Boy meets beer. Boy drinks beer. Boy meets another beer."
----------
"How's about a beer, Norm?"
"That's that amber sudsy stuff, right? I've heard good things about it!"
----------
"What's going on Mr Peterson?"
"The question is what's going in Mr. Peterson?
"A beer please, Woody."
----------
"Can I pour you a beer Mr. Peterson?"
"A little early isn't it, Woody?"
"For a beer?"
"No, for stupid Questions."