One of baseball?s chemical wonders of the world must have confused his performance-enhancers with his stain-lifters. This is Sammy Sosa, or what?s left of him. He either fell face-first into the bleach or he?s making plans to move into the empty room in ?Neverland.? Sosa, half of the All-Juiced, All-Fraud home run battle with Mark McGwire that saved baseball in 1998, apparently isn?t comfortable in his own skin in the aftermath of that. So he?s going through laser skin rejuvenation, according to Rebecca Polihronis, who is his friend and, I guess, his skin spokesperson. ?Women have it all of the time,? she said. ?He was surprised he came out looking so white.? From drugs to lasers. One day, the man may just spontaneously combust. And only then will we applaud.