If you were king of the world what rules would you change/enact?

The Joker

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WhatsHisNuts said:
#1 Melon would get removed from fruit salad. Sorry, but I won't budge on this one boys.

#2 If you sue someone and lose, you pay the defendant's legal fees plus all other costs incurred while that person or business had to put up with defending themselves against your dumb ass.

#3 It is unlawful to manufacture and sell yoga pants in sizes larger than Medium.

#4 Drugs legalized

#5 If you commit a crime involving a gun you will be put to death by firing squad (with that gun whenever possible)

#6 Prostitution legalized

#7 Fat tax. Specifics TBD

#8 No dependent tax credits

#9 Gambling legalized

#10 Transportation providers can't overbook. Prices will go up, tough shit.

#11 Gasoline taxes will be raised in the US to pay for high speed rail system. At least $1/gallon but probably more. Fuck off in advance. It's too cheap to drive and people are too fucking fat.

#12 Ban on artificial sweeteners and high fructose corn syrup
Click to expand...


This already happens more than you would think.
 
Penguinfan

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WhatsHisNuts said:
#1 Melon would get removed from fruit salad. Sorry, but I won't budge on this one boys.

#2 If you sue someone and lose, you pay the defendant's legal fees plus all other costs incurred while that person or business had to put up with defending themselves against your dumb ass.

#3 It is unlawful to manufacture and sell yoga pants in sizes larger than Medium.

#4 Drugs legalized

#5 If you commit a crime involving a gun you will be put to death by firing squad (with that gun whenever possible)

#6 Prostitution legalized

#7 Fat tax. Specifics TBD

#8 No dependent tax credits

#9 Gambling legalized

#10 Transportation providers can't overbook. Prices will go up, tough shit.

#11 Gasoline taxes will be raised in the US to pay for high speed rail system. At least $1/gallon but probably more. Fuck off in advance. It's too cheap to drive and people are too fucking fat.

#12 Ban on artificial sweeteners and high fructose corn syrup
Click to expand...

Good list, thank for playing along. Bonus points for telling people to "fuck off in advance". Not sure how I didn't think of #3 myself.
 
Blitz

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1. Anyone in the left lane with space in front of them and cars right behind them, shall be inprisoned (1st Offense) or crucified by the side of the road for all to see (2nd offense).

2. Greek Pizza shall be immediately and forever banned. Anyone caught making Greek Pizza shall be shot on sight!

3. Time clock in Poker. Length is negotiable and TBD.

4. Replay banned in Baseball. Games take too long as it is, people are human, live with it.
 
M

Mags

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Blitz said:
4. Replay banned in Baseball. Games take too long as it is, people are human, live with it.
Click to expand...

While I agree baseball games, especially AL games with the DH, go too long at times and the pace of play should be sped up - what I don't understand is, why does the NFL get a free pass on this?

The average NFL game is like 3 hours, 12 minutes - and of that, an NFL game has just under 11 minutes of actual game action that we watch.

All sports, including the NFL, could speed up their games. Easiest way is to cut down the advertising. But we'll never see that happen.
 
Cie

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WhatsHisNuts said:
#1 Melon would get removed from fruit salad. Sorry, but I won't budge on this one boys.

#2 If you sue someone and lose, you pay the defendant's legal fees plus all other costs incurred while that person or business had to put up with defending themselves against your dumb ass.

#3 It is unlawful to manufacture and sell yoga pants in sizes larger than Medium.

#4 Drugs legalized

#5 If you commit a crime involving a gun you will be put to death by firing squad (with that gun whenever possible)

#6 Prostitution legalized

#7 Fat tax. Specifics TBD

#8 No dependent tax credits

#9 Gambling legalized

#10 Transportation providers can't overbook. Prices will go up, tough shit.

#11 Gasoline taxes will be raised in the US to pay for high speed rail system. At least $1/gallon but probably more. Fuck off in advance. It's too cheap to drive and people are too fucking fat.

#12 Ban on artificial sweeteners and high fructose corn syrup
Click to expand...


A $1 tax per gallon on fuel, and we're still way the hell lower than Europe. I like it. Make it $2!

If you drive 10k miles annually, you are using roughly 500 gallons of fuel. Will $500/yr break any of you? This is why I never understood people freaking out when gas prices Spike.

I like how you crush the obese. I can see YYZ and livan hernandez squirming from here

I'll keep my dependent tax breaks, though. How else am I going to afford the fuel tax... LOL

Oh, and melon of all varieties sucks. Good call
 
StevieD

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WhatsHisNuts said:
#7 Fat tax. Specifics TBD

Instead of a fat tax I would suggest a FIT TAX. Us fat guys dies young. It is the FIT pricks that stay on Social Security and Medicare forever! Tax their skinny asses to the hilt. Us fat guys may never even make it to retirement!
Click to expand...
 
A

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If I were king the following would be the law of the land....

Drivers going below the speed limit in the left lane will be thrown in the moat without a trial....

Couples, friends, or families sitting together busy on their phones & not talking to each other will get charged double for their meal & drinks....

There will be term limits on every politician whether they are in local, state, or federal gov't....

All politicians will have the same health insurance as it's citizens, no matter what....

Gambling will be legalized & the king will get 10% of the action....
 
smurphy

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AR182 said:
If I were king the following would be the law of the land....

Drivers going below the speed limit in the left lane will be thrown in the moat without a trial....

Couples, friends, or families sitting together busy on their phones & not talking to each other will get charged double for their meal & drinks....

There will be term limits on every politician whether they are in local, state, of federal gov't....

All politicians will have the same health insurance as it's citizens, no matter what....

Gambling will be legalized & the king will get 10% of the action....
Click to expand...

Firm, but fair decrees. Here here! :0008
 
hammer1

hammer1

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AR182 said:
If I were king the following would be the law of the land....

Drivers going below the speed limit in the left lane will be thrown in the moat without a trial....

Couples, friends, or families sitting together busy on their phones & not talking to each other will get charged double for their meal & drinks....

There will be term limits on every politician whether they are in local, state, of federal gov't....

All politicians will have the same health insurance as it's citizens, no matter what....

Gambling will be legalized & the king will get 10% of the action....
Click to expand...


instead a da moat... How About a Water boarding Pay Per View?? Agree wid da rest !!
 
Penguinfan

Penguinfan

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I have rethought one of my original rules. Instead of politicians working for free they will work for the average paycheck of those they represent.

Want a raise? Then bring good paying jobs to your constituents.
 
bleedingpurple

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Mags said:
While I agree baseball games, especially AL games with the DH, go too long at times and the pace of play should be sped up - what I don't understand is, why does the NFL get a free pass on this?

The average NFL game is like 3 hours, 12 minutes - and of that, an NFL game has just under 11 minutes of actual game action that we watch.

All sports, including the NFL, could speed up their games. Easiest way is to cut down the advertising. But we'll never see that happen.
Click to expand...

Cause there are only 17 regular season weeks. MLB would get a pass if they had lets say a 100 game schedule
 
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