Episode 60 "The Winds of Winter" June 26
Arya gets revenge..........fuck yeah:firing::firing::firing::firing::Yep::Yep::Yep::Yep:
Well holy shit balls, did the writers ever clean house, people dying all over the place, wew baby:scared
- Cersei becomes her evil best with some really evil shit, she goes apeshit and just kills everybody (well almost everybody). We start things off in the king?s chambers, Tommen is ready to go to the trial and seal his mom?s fate, he doesn't seem happy, but hey kids go through mood swings, so we give him a pass. Anyway Tommen is about to head to the trial (I guess it wasn't like the OJ trial, no cameras in the courtroom so he has to attend in person) and The Mountain blocks him from leaving, yep The Mountain has turned into a babysitter, Tommen ain't going anywhere.
- Pycelle gets a message that the king wants to see him, and he goes to Qyburn?s lair, bad error. Pycelle has survived in the Red Keep?s court for a very long time. He?s one of the few whose services goes all the way back to the Mad King. He always goes back and forth always picking "the right side" to save his ass. This time, however, Pycelle chose poorly, picking Tommen over Cersei, I say again, bad error. Pycelle gets shanked to death by a gang of children, but hey at least he had sex right before he died, so not all bad. Although kind of rough to get killed by a gang of 9 year olds.
- In the Sept, we see pretty much everyone. There?s the High Sparrow, Lancel Lannister, Margaery Tyrell, and Ser Loras, and many others. And yes poor Ser Loras, poor poor Loras, he's a broken man, like a dude that has been stuck in a bad marriage for 30 years, he is just done, he doesn't give a fuck. The High Sparrow has mind fucked him so hard he just doesn't care, he's had enough. Loras confesses to everything from homosexuality to hacking the FBI's mainframe, dude just confessing all over the place. The High Sparrow has their cult?s star carved into his forehead, and nope no drugs for the pain he just carves it right in. Margaery is pissed, nope not happy at all about the carving. But then, Margaery starts to get concerned. No Cersei? No Tommen? That?s not good, she knows something ain't right.
- Sparrow, thinks everything is fine and he sends Lancel to fetch Cersei. On the way out Lancel ?catches? one of Qyburn?s ?little bird? spies. Lancel gives chase and he?s led to a dungeon by the Sept. The Little Bird stabs him in his spine, Lancel realizes he?s by a massive cache of wildfire, and it is then we realize that shit is about to get real! We now know what the discovery was by Qyburn?s "Little Birds" that he and Cersei were talking about. And wew baby did Cersei ever use that info to her advantage! It was like getting a tip to buy Google stock back in 1998!
- Back at the trial, Margaery tries to leave, but she?s blocked by the Faith Militant, and then BAM, everybody is dead, all dead, the bitch blew up everybody! The High Sparrow, Queen Margaery Tyrell, Ser Loras Tyrell, Mace Tyrell, Kevan Lannister, Lancel Lannister, and thousand of others, all dead. Yep she used the wildfire and blew em all up, what a bitch! And yes we lost the super hot, super sweet Queen Margaery Tyrell, fuck, that one hurt, that one hurt bad.
To recap.........Crown beats church. Don?t mess with Cersei.
- But hold on people, Cersei didn't kill everyone, in a dungeon, she has Septa Unella captive. She promised Unella last season that her face will be the last she ever sees, and she keeps her promise, well sort of, she promises Unella that she WON'T kill her, she is in for weeks of torture, weeks and weeks of torture! Yep Cersei is one mean bitch, she is getting major payback on Unella, oh fuck! Unella says she?s prepared to die. Cersei assures this won?t happen for a long time. ?This is your god now,? Cersei says and brings in The Mountain, as Cersei exits, she says the famous line, ?shame, shame, shame??, man that had to stick in Septa Unella's craw, man that was a deep cut! I say again, Cersei is one mean bitch.
- Tommen, like Pycelle, backed the wrong person, and he knows it. He picked his wife over his mother, his mom won, his wife lost. Tommen takes off his crown and leaps off his balcony. At least he gets to avoid an excruciatingly awkward chat with his mom. And yep, Cersei loses another son, but this time she really doesn't give a fuck. She sees Tommen body and says "burn him", yep she ain't heartbroken.
- Jaime arrives back in King's Landing to see the ruin of the city. He walks into the throne room just in time to see Cersei crowned as Queen of the Seven Kingdoms. He doesn't really know what the fuck happened but seems to be a little happy to see his incest buddy on the Throne. Shit just got real at King's Landing! Some major changes in King's Landing, total chaos, kind of like if Trump gets elected President of USA, total chaos!
- At Winterfell Melisandre (Fire Bitch) and Jon discuss events, Davos enters and confronts Melisandre with the burned stag figurine. She confesses to burning Shireen alive, but pleads that she was mistaken rather than malicious, and that both Selyse and Stannis had consented, well that makes it ok right? No it fucking doesn't. Sadly Fire Bitch manages to live, Fire Bitch pleads that she can be useful in the coming war, but Jon banishes her from the north, and Davos threatens that if she returns, he will execute her himself. Davos should not have said anything to Jon, he should have walked up to Fire Bitch and cut her head off as soon as she confessed to burning Shireen to death. I am pissed at Davos, he should have just killed her right on the spot and not asked for Jon's permission. Fuck, Fire Bitch lives, dammit.
- Littlefinger privately meets with Sansa in the godswood. There, Littlefinger reveals that his ultimate goal is to eventually sit on the Iron Throne with Sansa at his side. He then tries to kiss Sansa, Sansa is like no I don't think so and walks away, for once Littlefinger does not get his way, no Iron Throne for him.
- Jon gathers the various Northern lords, the knights of the Vale, and the Wildlings together to plan for the upcoming invasion by the White Walkers. The meeting doesn't seem to be going well, it seems the lords would prefer to return to their castles to wait out the coming winter. Jon warns them that this winter cannot be endured if they do not stand together to fight the White Walkers, the room ain't buying it, then the bad ass 12 year old girl Lyanna Mormont speaks up. She shames the various Northern lords for standing by and doing nothing when Jon called for their aid. She throws major shade on the room, major shade, she gives her speech drops the mic and sits down, she ain't having it. Realizing that Jon has proven his worth by retaking Winterfell, the Northern lords, knights of the Vale, and Wildlings agree to declare Jon the new King in the North. Jon is locked in, Jon Snow baby, Jon fucking Snow!
- Walder Frey celebrates the recapture of Riverrun, yep he's all happy, he's drinking and partying and banging his 9 teenage wives, all seems to be looking good for him.............then...........Walder has dinner alone, wondering where his sons Lothar Frey and Walder Rivers have gone. His servant then reveals to him that both men were baked into the meat pies he was previously eating. But that ain't no servant that is Arya bitches! Arya then introduces herself as Arya mother fucking Stark! She then slits Walder's throat, telling him that the last thing he will ever see is the face of a Stark, oh yes she did, yes she did! Arya gets revenge for the Red Wedding and slits his throat, oh hell yeah! Arya crosses another one off her list, this one the most important. Arya is da bomb, you go girl!
- Bran, Meera, and Benjen near the Wall, Benjen takes his leave since the Wall's magical protection prevents Wights like him from being able to cross it. Bran comes across one of those funky "talk to me" trees and decides to finally find out what happened at the Tower of Joy and reenters the memory. There, he sees the young Eddard scale the tower until he reaches the top room, where he finds his sister Lyanna Stark dying from childbirth. With her dying breath, Lyanna pleads with Eddard to take care of her son, confirming that Jon Snow is her's and the child of Rhaegar Targaryen, yep there we have it, we now know. And for those that forgot, Rhaegar was the older brother of Daenerys, so Snow has some Dragon in him! Rhaegar abducted Lyanna Stark and raped her, hence why Eddard kept the secret.
- In Dorne, Olenna meets with Ellaria concerning their mutual grievances against the Lannisters and discuss the possibility of an alliance. It looks like the Dorne-Tyrell alliance is teaming up to aid Daenerys, Cersei better look the fuck out, lots of angry chicks after her!
- Daenerys meets with Daario and informs him that he will not be accompanying her to Westeros, and will instead stay behind to rule Meereen and the rest of Slaver's Bay (now renamed the Bay of Dragons) in her absence, and ummmm Daario is pissed. Daario reluctantly accepts Daenerys' order, though makes it clear that he loves her, but that means shit, she's moving on to the next dude, or girl, as stated earlier she has her eyes set on Yara Greyjoy! Daenerys, Tyrion, Varys, Grey Worm, and Missandei then depart for Westeros with their combined Unsullied-Dothraki-Ironborn force in a massive invasion force, can you say intimidating, wew baby! Oh and don't forget Drogon, Rhaegal, and Viserion flying above, yep don't forget the dragons. Cersei is fucked, everybody coming for her, she picked the wrong time to be Queen of the Seven Kingdoms!
So all set up for season 7.......everybody coming for the Throne, look out!
Oh and let us not forget the quote of the season by Cersei "I love fucking my brother, I love the way he feels inside of me"........you don't find classic quotes like that in Shakespeare, just sayin'
Season 6 might very well be the best season ever, episodes 50-60 were pretty dam good, with number 59 being the best of all time. One hell of a season let me tell ya.