Episode 62......... July 23 ............ "Stormborn"
Ok let's start off what I have said at least 50 times, and I'll say it again, can somebody please kill Melisandre, this "Lord of the Light" cunt needs to pay for killing Shireen. She's back at her "Lord of Light" bullshit again, fucking hell! Hopefully when Davos arrives for the big meeting he'll run into Melisandre and kill the bitch.
- Daenerys confronts Varys and gives him a stern talk, yep very stern. Varys doesn't shit himself and stands his ground, Daenerys gives him a high five and all is forgiven. Daenerys decides it is a good idea to meet this Jon Snow dude, she sends out a group e-mail in hope Jon shows up. Daenerys' war council discusses their strategy for conquering Westeros, she lays out the plan, everyone agrees, it was a quick meeting, no Power Point presentation needed just got right to it.
- Grey Worm has a tongue, yep Missandei a huge fan of the Grey Worm tongue, huge fan. Gotta hand it to Grey Worm he played hard to get and it worked, well played Grey Worm, well played.
- Cersei gathers as many lords as she can, including Samwell Tarly father Randyll. She orders them to join forces with the Lannisters against Daenerys, citing Daenerys' army. They don't seem to be buying it, Jamie sees this and moves in on Randyll Tarly encouraging him to aid the Lannisters by promising him the title of Warden of the South. Will Randyll go back on his oath to House Tyrell? I hope not, that means he'll be fighting against Sam, and with all the literal shit Sam is dealing with does he really need his father fighting against him? Poor Sam, poor dude.
- Cersei and Qyburn visit the lower levels of the Red Keep, where the skulls of the Targaryens' dragons are kept. Qyburn reveals that he has been working on a Weapon of Mass Destruction that wil kill dragons, it seems like it might work, oh shit! That Qyburn dude is a wack job but you have to hand it to him he gets shit done. Not looking good for the Dragons, nope not good.
- Arya meets with her long lost buddy Hot Pie (who really knows how to rock a pie). He lets Arya know that Jon has defeated the Boltons and has reclaimed Winterfell. Arya is fired up and gets on the next Shuttle Bus to Winterfell. While in the woods we get to see the long-lost direwolf Nymeria! There are only two direwolves left (Jon's and Arya's) and Nymeria is alive, fuck yeah! Sadly it looks like Nymeria is all grown up now and has no interest in hanging out with Arya again, but hey at least Nymeria stayed alive after all these years.
- Jon announces to the Lords that he and Davos will travel to Dragonstone to secure the Dragon glass. Yep Jon is going to see his Aunt but he has no idea he's related to her, that should make for an interesting meeting let me tell ya! Now that Jon has left, Sansa is Queen of the North, and Littlefinger could not be happier. Although his joy soon turns sour when Jon tells him "You touch my sister I'll kill you myself", yep that brought is boner down a little.
- Sam gets all bad ass and shit and is determined to save Jorah Mormont (Sam was big fan of Jorah father) from his bad skin rash. Sam logs into WebMd and finds an ointment, we shall see if it works. Sam is stepping up big time, every day he's making Westeros Great Again, Trump would be proud.
- Well fuck shit fuck, I guess we found out what Euron Greyjoy's gift to Cersei is, yep it is the Sand Snakes (well two of em). Yara's fleet is attacked by Euron Greyjoy's fleet, Obara and Nymeria Sand are killed in the resulting battle and Ellaria and Tyene are taken prisoner, fuck fuck fuck! And yes I know there were only three Sand Snakes but I am throwing the mother into the equation, so yes technically only one Sand Snake remains, but Cersei is going to torture both of em so pretty soon they'll both be dead. I loved me some Sand Snakes and now they are done for, I say again, fuck!
- Euron subdues Yara and taunts Theon to come rescue her, Theon freaks out and cries and jumps overboard leaving his sister to die, that was weak sauce right there, a giant cup of weak sauce for sure.
Great fight scene on the ships, that was some good stuff right there, fast paced battle, gotta love it. Euron is a bad motherfucker, what an entrance when he took Yara's ship, fuck!